We are delighted to say that the TOGs and Charity Goods have managed to raise £587,482 this year for BBC Children in Need.

Now my initial thought was disappointment that we did not manage to reach the million pounds again as we have done the last three years, but one thing being a TOG has taught me is to look at things from all angles. So I sat down and looked at the individual things that Norman and I and the TOGs had done to raise the money and the pleasure and joy that has brought to so many people. The Langham Charity Lunch, the TOGs eBay Auction, The TOGs singing the Frog Chorus, Bandaged Together and of course the very popular Janet & John stories.

So it may not be a million pounds but it certainly will help a lot of children have a better life and it has certainly brought a lot of people together in Sir Terry’s name.

Being without Sir Terry in the mornings is different. I am very happily listening to Chris Evans and joining in when he says something that sparks my interest, which is how a good Breakfast Show should be.  BUT being a TOG is something more than being a radio show listener.  I have learnt more in the last 11 years than I have in the first 40 odd years of my life. I have learnt about people and relationships and loyalty and trust and the feeling that Sir Terry creates within me when I listen to him or even think about the work we are doing in his name.

I don’t know how it happened really, but I do know that it is now forever part of my life. Sir Terry has shown me how wonderful it is to laugh, how we can laugh through sadness and still very much care about the sadness.  This PC world that we live in tries to stop us seeing laughter in sadness, tries to make us feel guilty about so many things. Sir Terry gives you permission, he gets away with more than most, because people know that he is taking the mickey, they know that deep down he really does care about people and children, but he can still laugh at things that are funny even though we are not supposed to.

But it’s more than that, it’s the very strong bond of friendship that being a TOG has created. TOGs really do care and will go that extra mile to make a difference.  TOGs travel from all over the country at the drop of a hat if the TOGmeister calls. They come to our home and spend hours putting CDs into envelopes all for the promise of the odd glass of wine and cheese sandwich.  They sit in their own homes watching TV or listening to the radio packing and posting goodies and if anyone visits they drag them into doing the same.

But it’s even more than that....... the letters and emails from most of the TOGs are warm and full of a feeling of belonging. They don’t have to be packing and posting they don’t even have to be buying the Janet & John CDs or the Bandaged CDs, they just feel part of it. They may well throw a few pennies in a bucket on CIN day, or they may phone in and talk to one of the TOGs manning the phones on the Radio 2 phone in day.  They don’t even have to support BBC Children in Need, I know I support a number of charities, because there are so many people out there who need help.

It’s that feeling of belonging to a family with the TOGmeister very much being head of the household, one of those old fashioned households where the Dad was the boss and the children did as they were told, but when the father laughed it was the best feeling in the world. We look up to and respect him, but sometimes, only sometimes don’t agree with what he says, but would never dare tell him.

For me it’s a comfortable feeling of old and new, old fashioned values, but happily, if slowly, being dragged into the technological world we live in.  For instance twitter has opened up the world yet again…. I have “met” another group of TOGs who all have that same feeling of belonging and sense of humour, who laugh at the stupidest of things but know that if they are rude or unkind that you can just block them and there will be no more communication. We even have a twibe called TOT which is TOGs on Twitter and our own polo shirt designed by a lovely TOG @Dickiezip who unfortunately died last month and we all miss him but are so glad he was in our lives for even a short time.

So where was I going with this article??? (See Toggy through and through…..) Really it is just to say a very big Thank You to the TOGmeister for changing my life and for showing me that life is for living and we are allowed to laugh when others frown. Thank you to the wonderful TOGs who are true friends and to the whole host of new TOGs who I have met or communicated with, who just “get it”.

If you are a true TOG, then you do just get it, you don’t really need anyone to explain what it means to be a TOG, you just are.

Many, many years ago, the late (and very much missed) Pauly Walters asked me to try and bring the TOGs together in the name of Sir Terry to support one thing to raise money for BBC Children in Need. I think I can say that with his help and many others at Radio 2 along the way, we have achieved this. Pauly was always very supportive and encouraging, but he never helped me with celebrities or bent the rules for me. I had to work hard to find the right people and only after a number of years did he start introducing me to some wonderful country singers like Gretchen Peters and Nanci Griffith. He believed in making me work and proving that I could do it myself. We lost Pauly a few years ago now and again the feelings of love and sadness that were shown were because we had lost one of our own.

The emails, letters and phone calls from TOGs we received after Sir Terry went into retirement showed us that they were feeling lost without their TOGmeister to cheer them and to encourage them, but they were not willing to give up and walk away, this was a family that was going to stay TOGether even if the father was going to be more of a long distance father

          (the TOT poloshirt designed by Dickie)

I read something on twitter the other day and I thought it was so very true, and Sir Terry really did teach me this “It’s not what happens to you, that’s important, it’s how you deal with it.”

But there is a light or a glimmer on the horizon, Sir Terry too is allowing himself to be dragged into the technological world and his office has set up a Facebook and Twitter account and very soon there will be a www.terrywogan.com website where he will be, from time to time, virtually cheering us upwards and onwards.

Have I wandered off on a tangent again... oh well, never mind, mustn’t grumble eh?

 

Hellen x x x

 

P.S. You can follow me @hellenbach @bignormski1 or @terry_wogan on twitter.